Email from Me to Tammy about Travis (this happened Friday)

I meant to tell you what Travis did for me.  The first time you guys went to the ER as a group (holly in ER), and Wendy and I were home with daddy, she had gone out onto the porch to give me some alone time with him.  But I was such a lost puppy, I had no idea what to do.  He didn’t want to watch the news, so I suggested a movie.  He turned one on that he and mama watched together and it seemed to be too much for him.  So he got up and started putzing around, got himself some soda, etc.  Travis came in about then to check on us.  He sat down beside me and I just poured my pathetic heart out to him telling him I had no idea what I was doing, he was so sad and I didn’t know what to say.  You and Max and the other kids seemed to do great but I couldn’t even make him feel comfortable enough to stay in his chair. Travis said, “you have it all wrong aunt Julie.  I think it’s exactly what he needs.”  He went on to explain how each of you helped him in a different way, but my way wasn’t wrong.  He said, as he motioned to grandpa walking around, that it was the first time he’d seen grandpa doing what he did when grandma was there.  He said he was always getting up like that and walking around.  Daddy looked at some pictures on the frig and then walked into his room.  I looked at Travis and said, “what if he’s going in there to cry, what do I do?”  He said, “you let him.”  He said, “aunt Julie, if we don’t let him grieve he’s going to go into a deep depression and that would be worse.  You can check on him in a few minutes, but it’s okay if he goes in there to cry.”  He continued to talk to me and calm me down.  Grandpa came out soon and sat in his chair again.  I told travis thank you, that he had somehow had this moment of perfect clarity and he was able to help me feel much better about sitting with daddy.  He said, “well, it doesn’t happen often so you can count yourself lucky that you got it!”  Very sweet experience.  It’ll go down in the memories I’m working on recording from the week.  Anyway, thought you’d enjoy that.
Sure love you, J.
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